The Party (Needs editing)

9:45 AM

The Party [S: Lucidimine, x2]

I am in a large house and I believe I am living in. We are having a party. It may be a Christmas party. I find myself going in and out of the dream and wakefulness. Each time I come into the dream and visiting with a different person at the party.

Lori.I'm sitting with a group of people. We are actually lounging around on the floor. Lights are very bright very vivid everyone is very colorful. Our bodies are touching I'm lying next to Laurie. She is very giggly and happy. I think I have some ice in my mouth and I make a ploy to share with her by kissing her. She she does some awkward thing by saying she's going to put her mouth next to mine so that I can put the ice in without kissing her. That's the obvious reference to the end of our relationship and didn't and particularly well.

The swimming pool. There's a platform up a series of stairs where, very dream like, you can just jump in the water and start swimming. At one point I do this with another young man that seems to be basically trying to assault me sexually in A drunk playful but aggressive manner. There seems to be some doubt if he's being successful.

There's another in counter with a group of people and roll kind of a long together. Similar to floating down the lazy river. I'm reaching around trying to figure out who's who in encounter penis of one of the men.

Two older women. I'm on the staircase but I'm looking down there to wind up just come in the door. We are talking to them and they invite us to a party that they're having. Their party is a Christmas party. That may be where I got the idea that this whole dream is a Christmas party. We discuss in some detail

What and where their party is. I can see their dresses which are sort of elaborate an old fashion in great detail. I may also be wearing hats. I'm talking to a person next to me and I am proud that I can figure out what they're talking about. He was not at all certain what they were even talking about.

Notes. When I started this dream I was concentrating on being lucid. I didn't seem to work. I was also concentrating I asked the dream to give me some advice on Julia and how I could help her. When the dream is over I was depressed myself. Laurie I think was one of several women in the dream that I had previous relationships with. Or trying to have a relationship with. None of them were working well. So now I'm wondering how well Julia's relationship with Jeff really went. I know he had issues with his mother. I'm considering sharing with joy and some of my relationship difficulties. Will see.

What was the dream trying to tell me? That I had a number of relationships where I hurt people. I'm not sure what else is pretty depressing.

What am I going to do about it? Not sure. I don't want to further to press my daughter. But just being honest I hope will help. That's basically all I have.