Lounging on the Horse Farm, Trout Fishing with Alex

7:12am

Lounging on the Horse Farm [DS: many, many, especially seeing my hands]

I am  in a large open room in a house. There is a big picture window showing the outside. There are chairs and couches possibly. My focus in on an old style TV set. It has been installed on a swivel platform, some of the accessories, like the tape drive, are in a custom part of the platform surrounded by carpet. I think this is very high end at some time in the past. The carpet is frayed around some of the openings.

My focus is on a video I am watching on the TV. It is about a horse farm and the people who have used its service. The farm sells very high end horses.  Lots of money for exclusive rich people. The film is about how when you lose your money or fame they switch out the horse at the last moment to a lesser breed. I am not sure if the farm I am on got one of the horses and it was then switched or if I am on the farm the video is discussing. After watching a segment I try and rewind the video and get it to a certain point where one of the exclusive customers is discussing his experience. I can not seem to get to the same spot. I spend the rest of the dream with the remote in my hand, pressing play and trying to get back to that segment so I can discuss it.

I am with two other young men. I am a guest but they work on the farm regularly. We are all watching the TV as I try and find the spot. At some point I am using the remote as a pointer. I can see the cross hairs pointing at the TV console, but the tape player keeps changing position and even transforming from a VCR in a DVD format (Fat slot vs thin, vertical vs horizontal). The boys tell me I am not doing it right. I look at the TV and it has changed position. It was against the wall in front of me, it is now to my right. I comment on it and they swivel the TV around as if that is the explanation.

Every few minutes I try the remote again. It feels like it is fast forwarding but never getting the place I want. A third guy, possibly a little older, comes in. He asks us why we are sitting around instead of working. I tell him no one has told me what to do. If I just start doing stuff it will create more problems that it will solve. I also scold him a bit that the boys have been complaining for two days that no one is in charge. Instead of giving us things to do, he leaves taking this information into consideration.

As we are sitting in front of the TV I see out the window, someone working on washing a series of cars. I am looking at the front of 4-6 cars. He is running a hose over them, I assume as part of washing them. He is nudging them with his knee so he can reach all of them. I wonder how he is doing this and think that the black top driveway must tilt slightly up hill. He is pushing them up hill, all at once, and then letting them slid back. He is doing this very naturally with little effort. I assume he does this often. I think it is odd that there are what appear to be fleet cars (they are all painted the same) on the farm, but assume it is part of a larger operation. [Now that I am awake, it was lost on me that he was pushing the cars uphill from the side of the first car. That would make them moving against the way the tires roll]. At one point the cars were moving back and forth like the driveway was some kind of a conveyor.

Trout Fishing with Alex [Part of the same dream]

I am sitting in the front seat of a car. We are getting ready to go trout fishing. Possibly Alex is going and I am just watching. I am still trying get fast forward the video with the remote in my hand. [That's how I know it is the same dream] I go back and forth from being in the car to sitting among several fisherman who are also preparing or have just returned. The scene is very vivid and lush.

There is stream to my left that is flowing into a small culvert surrounded by rocks. In fron of me is a large rock that provides a rough table between waist and chest high. On my right is a couch is fishermen sitting on it in repose. At some point I see two men crawl into the tinny culvert if full fishing gear. I ask the ones sitting next to me how long it take getting through it and they say 15 minutes. I am some what horified imaging quezing through the dark and wet for 15 minutes just to go fiahing. I wonder why they can't just walk over the stream. In front of me a fisherman is preparing a fish he ahs caught. He has a larlge dog next to him who is sitting like a human, on his but with feet out front. He give the dog a the fish and he eats it whole without changing position.

I am lookng very closely at the men to my right. They are all friendly and talkative. One of them has a whole going through his jaw from one side of his neck to the other. It is about an inch in diameter, very clean and regular, completely healed smooth skin inside. Another has many convoluted veins or somesort of growth on his neck. It doesn't seem to be bothering him.

Graphic Quality.  I as going back into a dream and see a dim foggy image. I say to the dream, "higher image quality" or something like that. I know it is a dream and might as well have good quality images. Pre-Lucid?

Malfunctiong Bike Riding. I am peddeling a bike that transforms as I peddle it. It does not have all the proper structural compoents, but works them out with the force of my peddling. [Weird, not wholebike is a recurring theme]

Notes: This series of dreams and scenes were very easy to remember. Even after adjusting my posistion in bed. It seems like I had 10-20 opportunities to go lucid when I saw my hands on the remote. I asked the pendulum if it is conscous or subsonscious that is blocking my recognizing this dream sign, but it answered "I don't know."

What is the dream telling me?  You have a million opportunites to go lucid. I keep presenting them. Concentrate on you hands!

What am I going to do about it? Concentrate on my hands during the day, then do a reality check.

The Miracle, The Graphic Nightmare

11:14pm

The Miracle [This dream was from yesterday but has been persistent in my memory]

[I am going in and out of a serieers of similar dream snippets. I have a real ongoing pain in my abdomen] I see an immage of single graphic image. There is a light sinple graphic shape in the middle. It is a combination of two companents. This idea is very clear as I am dreaming, but imposible to describe when I awake. The fact that the two compenents being brought together is so unusual that it can be called a miracle. The image comes together again and again. I wake up.

The Graphic Nightmare

I see a graphic image. It is part of a larger image. It is very familiar. I then get the idea that there are a series of images from my past that can actually illicit fear. There is nothing scarry or fearful about the images themsleves, but they illicit fear.  I see a series of pieces of images that I recognize from differenct times in my life. One or two of them are really scarry. I am shocked an amazed that an image can have this effect. I see a series of small square images go by. It is very similar to the Flipcard view in Google Blogger or the way albums used to be viewed in iTunes.

Notes: I am in pain unless I am on ibuprophen or acidaminophin. I will go see a doctor tomorrow. These primarily graphic dreams are very unusual. The expreme emotional reaction to an abstract graphic images was very moving and curious.

What was the dream trying to tell me?  I have no idea.

What am I going to do about it?  Try to hook up with Steve.

I Have to Get to School (Needs editing)

I Have to Get to School (a long series of dreams) I am with a group of friends. We have just finished project and we need to go to school. It's getting late so we may be late

I'm trying to make my way to school but it is complicated. I'm trying to ride a bicycle but somebody gave me their's. It has two wheels and a seat but it doesn't have handlebars. Instead of handlebars I'm holding something that has a chain hanging down from it a delicate chain like something you might wear around your neck and I'm inserting that into the into the tube that the handlebars normally go into trying to establish control I am so upset that I am crying.

I'm now with another group of friends that is taking an alternate path they are going through some dark tunnel they're sliding down the shoots it's cold it's dark it's wet they seem to be making good progress. As I think about the dream I'm confused is whether I was just checking on them or I was with them as well.

Still on our way to somewhere, we come into a field and there are lots of other people in the field and there's something happening. There's piles a little things. I look at them closely and they turn out to be piles of sheets of plastic. I pick one up and realize that it is a poncho. Like a military issue cheap one plastic plastic square with or without a place for your head in the middle. Then look around and I see piles of boxes. One was sort of neatly stack some of them are falling apart they in various stages of disarray. They might but I assume that they are military and they were potentially drop from an airplane. I realize that I am on the mall. I think it's odd that there would be a military operation right in the middle of downtown DC.

However I am very curious as to what's in the boxes and high start opening them and find different things in each box. As I am searching through the box I realize that there is a man from the military or the government that is trying to protect the things that are falling from the sky. Starts yelling at people. He glances at me but I run around another pile and continue my search.

Now I'm in a hurry I look in a box and And find a very interesting piece for equipment. It's made out of that military green canvas it opens up and it's got maybe 20 pockets of all different sizes with those cool little leather tops with a brass piece that comes through itto keep them close I can't think of any specific purpose it will have but it's really cool and I take it because I figure it will be quick and easy and I won't get to keep them close I can't think of any specific purpose it will have but it's really cool and I take it because I figure it will be quick and easy and I won't get caught.

I am possibly back in my house but I'm doing some sort of difficult task. Now I am with the person who was yelling at me about breaking into the boxes on the mall. But now he is helping me. I don't remember what task or performing at something it's moderately difficult and he has Summernight ideas about how to approach it. He's helping me solve the problem.

Notes: This was a series of dreams that I went back-and-forth into in the morning. This was over a period of three hours. I'd gotten up and went back to sleep pretty quickly within five minutes. What are the amazing aspects is that in one segment there was a character who was an enemy he was chasing me and threatening me and then later segment he was then my friend helping me. I must've gone back into the dream series at least four times from being awake. Each time I went back in I tried to review the segments that I remembered so that by the time I woke up I've reviewed some of the site segments for five times.

What was the dream trying to tell me? Nothing jumps out at me without taking a closer look and I don't have time right now. Julia is in a mental hospital because she's thinking about suicide. That has to be on my mind somewhere.

What am I going to do about it? ?

The Party (Needs editing)

9:45 AM

The Party [S: Lucidimine, x2]

I am in a large house and I believe I am living in. We are having a party. It may be a Christmas party. I find myself going in and out of the dream and wakefulness. Each time I come into the dream and visiting with a different person at the party.

Lori.I'm sitting with a group of people. We are actually lounging around on the floor. Lights are very bright very vivid everyone is very colorful. Our bodies are touching I'm lying next to Laurie. She is very giggly and happy. I think I have some ice in my mouth and I make a ploy to share with her by kissing her. She she does some awkward thing by saying she's going to put her mouth next to mine so that I can put the ice in without kissing her. That's the obvious reference to the end of our relationship and didn't and particularly well.

The swimming pool. There's a platform up a series of stairs where, very dream like, you can just jump in the water and start swimming. At one point I do this with another young man that seems to be basically trying to assault me sexually in A drunk playful but aggressive manner. There seems to be some doubt if he's being successful.

There's another in counter with a group of people and roll kind of a long together. Similar to floating down the lazy river. I'm reaching around trying to figure out who's who in encounter penis of one of the men.

Two older women. I'm on the staircase but I'm looking down there to wind up just come in the door. We are talking to them and they invite us to a party that they're having. Their party is a Christmas party. That may be where I got the idea that this whole dream is a Christmas party. We discuss in some detail

What and where their party is. I can see their dresses which are sort of elaborate an old fashion in great detail. I may also be wearing hats. I'm talking to a person next to me and I am proud that I can figure out what they're talking about. He was not at all certain what they were even talking about.

Notes. When I started this dream I was concentrating on being lucid. I didn't seem to work. I was also concentrating I asked the dream to give me some advice on Julia and how I could help her. When the dream is over I was depressed myself. Laurie I think was one of several women in the dream that I had previous relationships with. Or trying to have a relationship with. None of them were working well. So now I'm wondering how well Julia's relationship with Jeff really went. I know he had issues with his mother. I'm considering sharing with joy and some of my relationship difficulties. Will see.

What was the dream trying to tell me? That I had a number of relationships where I hurt people. I'm not sure what else is pretty depressing.

What am I going to do about it? Not sure. I don't want to further to press my daughter. But just being honest I hope will help. That's basically all I have.

School for Young Spies (Needs editing)

8:00 AM

School for Young Spies

First day at work. I have just started a new job.I am with a large I am with a large job group of young people. You're in a large open room but we each have our own individual workstation. It was understood we are spies however our task at hand is to sort diamonds. It's very detailed demanding task. We're all wearing business clothes from the 1950s. My superior, an older gentleman. Sis me down and shows me the basics. There is a men's detail throughout the dream. He shows me how to look at the diamonds each diamond is in a tray. There is all this dust diamond dust in the tray. Somehow we get to keep the diamond dust which has value. You just need to be very careful and precise about where in win to collect it. Just the way it's by line operate out in the public.I learn quickly and become proficient.

Going to lunch. Everyone in the facility is going to lunch. We were walking out fairly casual he in a good mood. There's some issue about exactly who I'm going to lunch with. It's not clear.

sex on the job. I am being led through a complex series of offices. There are many people sitting in chairs doing various jobs and all these shared spaces. I am following behind whoever may be my boss. Very attractive woman in high heels tight skirt white blouse that reveals her charms. it is apparent that she was taking me to a private place to have sex. There is a third person with us that is sort of a cover but it is obvious to everyone what is happening.

As I walk through the offices people are staring. I am looking at all the things on the walls. There

are some very detailed the devices that have been worked very diligently by number of people that are working there. I noticed a number of things that are all done by the same person and I'm impressed with the excellence of the work. All this while rushing down through the offices. We go through door and get into Porter things are very tight Dinero quarter there are number of offices that are at odd angles. I have never been in this quarter before. I see the woman/boss who I am following I see her office. Her name is on the door. It is Rebecca Turner written on the glass. I am still getting oriented I need to catch up with her. I followed her down the hallway turning right into what will soon be a secluded room that has a very specific purpose. We intend to use the room for an unintended purpose a private one.

Fussing at my coworker. I am working on a detailed demanding task. Also associated with diamonds. I'm doing something with my fingers and I'm taking one hand and put in two or three fingers on top of another. Somehow this on lining of my fingers makes the task easier. My coworker sitting right across A small I'll comments are you doing in the wussy way. Doesn't use that your word wussy he uses some more that is the meaning and means that I'm doing it in a way that is not masculine. I will raise my voice slightly but it's more in my tone for telling that I am doing it in a way that will allow me to best perform the task. I have no any idea whether it is masculine or not buy it is irrelevant to doing the best job. Also implying he should keep to hisself if that's all he has to say.

Sex at work. I am working very hard at my desk again in an open space. This time there are large tables filled with smaller sections all of which of diamonds. It is very complex. There are a series of precise whites. Like jewelers lights. They are arranged in individualize Waze. So each one lights a small space. As I'm working I realize at the light I need is not on. I go around the table and up to a whole series of lights or light switches. They are arranged somewhat haphazardly all attached to some sort of device there might be 10 or 15 of them. It is not at all obvious which switch goes to which light and I am looking through them very precisely trying to figure out which one I need to turn on. I arrive at one of the very top that I had not seen before but I figure out is the correct one. I mention that I've never seen this before and never been trained for this but I have figured it out. I turn the light on. At this point my superior comes in, I woman, and comments so I'm very nasty about how long it took me or why am I working in the dark. Something snide and demeaning. She turns on her high heels is walking away. We are large open space that might be 50 people in the room. I yell after her you don't have to be a bitch. She is totally shocked she turns around. She walks up to me and slaps me in the face. She turns walks away again and I yell again possibly with tears in my eyes, we would die for you. She turns to me with a very exasperated look on her face and says follow me and I she may have tears in her eyes or as close to losing it I follow her out of the room.

Notes. I did my first session at the oasis two months last night. It was a very small crowd but very inspiring. We stay till 10 o'clock. I talked to Cindy briefly with texting she was in the ER with Julia after she attempted to it's commit suicide.

I need to give myself instructions before going to sleep that I am lose it I will have lucid dreams. I need to be very specific.

What is the dream telling me? I need to think about it I can't do that right now.

What am I going to do about it?

Vervain Fantasies

12:13 pm

Vervain Fantasies  [S: Vervain, 1 tbsp, tea]

Scene 1. I am looking in a large ornate mirror. It is Perhaps 4ft wide and 6ft long.It is an old mirror and the image is mottled.  I immediately realize I am doing a kind of reality check. I see an image of just a face, it is not mine. It is like a portrait from the renaissance. The image keeps changing to a different face. Similar to the way a slot machine rolls through a series or imagines. I think, "I am doing a reality check. I am dreaming." Note: I then proceed to have a series of very vivid dreams, going in and out or wakefulness, all without moving.

Scene 2. I am in a room with a young woman. They are several people in the room. He mother is present. We are sitting on cushions that are arranged on two sides of the room on raised platforms about the height of a chair. There is a narrow channel between the platforms where the floor provides a place for our feet. She says she wants a message and I agree. She has very pale skin that is exposed by a large open panel on the back of her dress. I agree or suggest we should do it with her in the nude and leave to get supplies.

Scene 3. I am going back and forth into the dream state very rapidly. I am slightly frustrated that I can not make the jump to full lucidity, but am amazed about how easy it is to travel back and forth. Almost any image transforms into a dream segment or image. I try to clear my mind when awake. I can not come up with any specific technique for accomplishing this in the future. It occurs to me, that I should not need to be sleepy to do this. [DH]

Vervain (Verbena officinalis)

Notes: The vervain was a gift from a member (The free spirit) of the Rhine Center Dream Group. I definitely need to get more. 

What is the dream telling me? Vervain works for me. 

What I am going to do? Get more. Grow it in the front yard. (Looks like butterflies may like it too. 

They Were Going To Hurt Us

1:15 pm

They Were Going To Hurt Us (needs work)

Scene 1. I am with a group of 10ish people we are in a room that is adjacent to another room where a group of people are in a conference (about the same number) We are a related subgroup. The are the higher ups. We may be waiting for word from them or provide some sort of import, I am unsure.

Scene 2.I am back in this room at another meeting, or later in the same meeting. A team of police or some other authorities come into out meeting space. They threaten us in some manner and leave.

Scene 3. We are again in the same room, there are two adjoining rooms. One is the conference room the other is an entry space, there may be glass/a window in thew wall. It connects to our room through a open section, there is no door. The authorities come in again and threaten us in some way. Now we all have handguns in our pockets. I have one, but I am very unfamiliar with it. I pull it out and try and shoot one of the authorities. The trigger is very hard to pull and my hand is unsteady. It may be because I am old and weak. It takes several seconds, but the official does not react and I shoot and kill him. All of the other authorities have been dispatched in the same way. We feel we have done the right thing and protected the people in the conference room. They are unaware of what we have done. We line all the bodies up in a neat line in the entrance room against the room with the window. We leave.

Scene 4. I have the gun in my pocket. I am trying to avoid the authorities that are searching for us. I am looking for a place to get rid of the gun where it will not be discovered. I try behind a very well maintained bush, in a shallow stream, nothing is working, I am panicking. I see on the authorities coming toward me and I toss the gun behind a row of bushes against a short wall. It is obviously a very poor location. I think I did not even wipe my prints. I wake up.

Flashes: I had flashes of an object several times while going back and forth. Sometimes it was an object from the dream, at one point it was a stainless steel bowl (very similar to one of our mixing bowls) that was flashing really brightly, perhaps light or sparks were coming out of or into the bowl.

Notes: I woke up to an alarm at 8:20 am. I went immediately back to sleep and didn't wake until after noon. I was going back and forth into the dream several times. I also had a very clear small vision (like a gif) of eating apple raisin salad. I recently made some. I imagined eating it in very vivid multi-sensual detail. I could taste it and feel the cold smoothness in my mouth. I thought it may be an entry into a WILD. I should thy this again in the future. [DH]

What is the dream trying to tell me? I have very little insight. It has the recurring themes of business, organizations, authority, violence, shame, fear.

What am I going to do abut it? Look at other dreams, try and figure something out.